Then was our mouth filled with laughter, and our tongue with singing: then said they among the heathen, The LORD hath done great things for them. Psalm 126:2
On God’s Time
A man walked to the top of a hill to talk to God.
The man asked, “God, what’s a million years to you?” and God said, “A minute.”
Then the man asked, “Well, what’s a million dollars to you?” and God said, “A penny.”
Then the man asked. “God…..can I have a penny?” and God said, “Sure…..in a minute.”
Care for the Mother-in-law
A man, his wife and his mother-in-law went on vacation to the Holy Land. While they were there, the mother-in-law passed away.
The undertaker told them, ‘You can have her shipped home for $5000, or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for $150. ‘
The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked, ‘Why would you spend $5000 to ship your mother-in-law home, when it would be wonderful to have her buried here and spend only $150?’
The man replied, ‘a man died here 2000 years ago, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can’t take that chance. ‘
God Enjoys a Good Laugh
There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:
1. He called everyone brother
2. He liked Gospel
3. He didn’t get a fair trial
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:
1. He went into His Father’s business
2. He lived at home until he was 33
3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother was sure He was God
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:
1. He talked with His hands
2. He had wine with His meals
3. He used olive oil
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:
1. He never cut His hair
2. He walked around barefoot all the time
3. He started a new religion
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:
1. He was at peace with nature
2. He ate a lot of fish
3. He talked about the Great Spirit
But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:
1. He never got married.
2. He was always telling stories.
3. He loved green pastures.
But the most compelling evidence of all – 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:
1. He fed a crowd at a moment’s notice when there was virtually no food
2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn’t get it
3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do
In Him Alone
The Counterfeit Christian
2015 The Year of our Lord